I could just cry!!! It was a spring night in 2017 and I was lying in bed, alternating between staring at the ceiling and the clock.
I’d stayed up late the night before finishing up a project to meet a deadline and I’d BARELY made it through the day. My butt had been dragging!! I'd felt a like a zombie, trying to hide my undead condition during my noonday meeting. And then I knew I was exhausted when I fell asleep IN THE MIDDLE OF EATING DINNER (#facedowninsalad)!!!
‘Ok Kimberlyn,’ I thought, ‘This is fixable. Just get a good night’s sleep tonight!’ So I went to bed early—by my standards at least—about 10:15 pm. I woke up to go to the bathroom at exactly 1:26 (I checked the clock as I got back in bed). Then the hamster started running, and I began to think about some tasks that needed to be handled first thing in the morning, and….
It was all over at that point—I couldn’t fall back to sleep. I remember glancing at the clock REPEATEDLY over the course of the night: 1:58… 2:34…. 3:05… 3:29… you get the picture.
I finally fell asleep around 5:30 and dragged myself out of bed at 7, unrested, frustrated, and resentful.
Eating lunch at my desk (I was too exhausted to think about going out) I was trying to stay awake by browsing the internet. I searched on “insomnia,” and learned I wasn’t alone.
OK, fast forward to spring 2020. I’m talking to friends and relatives and I’m hearing HEARTRENDING stories of folks struggling to keep a normal schedule. People juggling working from home with managing their kids’ online school assignments, finding room for work spaces, fears about the health of loved ones or lost/decreased income, the confusion and frustrations of mixed messages about self-care and preventing infection.
What is the connection between those two stories? Stress and the lack of daily consistency.
I BELIEVE that the lack of a consistent, supportive schedule directly increased the amount of stress in my life.
Now, I’m not talking about a vacation when I’m looking forward to change and excitement. I mean that when it is time to get work done, the pressure of having to perform without a consistent support structure can take an incredible toll on health, well-being, and emotional balance.
I thought I’d share the techniques I used back then to keep myself from spiraling into a weeks- or months-long bout of insomnia. By employing these techniques, I built a better morning, and the benefits echoed throughout my day and night.
To help get you back on track, here are my TOP 3 TIPS to start building a better morning. And I promise you, the beneficial effects will ripple throughout your entire day. It all starts here …
1. (Re)Commit to a gently supportive schedule
The trick to a successful morning schedule starts the night before. Make a commitment to yourself to be in bed — and even schedule that bedtime into your calendar — a half-hour earlier every few days until you’re hitting the sack by 10 or 11 p.m.
Avoid making too big of a shift too soon (the mistake I made that night in 2016) and give your body a few days to adjust to your new bedtime.
Deep sleep is imperative because that’s where rapid eye movement (REM) occurs, vital to restoring bodily detox processes and keeping your body in balance.
Troubleshooting
If you’re having trouble getting enough rest, you may want to try one of these hacks …
- Supplement with melatonin at bedtime to promote relaxation
- Drink mugwort or chamomile tea an hour or so before bedtime
- Avoid exposure to all electronics at least 2 hours before bedtime, but know even 30 minutes before bedtime offers some benefits
- Diffuse lavender essential oil for 10 minutes or apply a drop topically with a carrier oil to your temples
- Practice meditation or prayer
2. Aim to rise between 5 and 7 a.m.
As your bedtime normalizes, shoot for 7 to 8 hours of sleep and wake earlier and closer to the time of sunrise.
Be sure to avoid electronics first thing in the morning and take a few minutes to say or write down things you're grateful for before stepping out of bed. Practice gratitude as a way to neutralize fear and increase happiness.
3. Build something to savor into every morning
You may have heard that Yale is offering its most popular course ever online for free right now. That class? “The Science of Happiness.” And one important lesson in that course focuses on “savoring.”
According to instructor Laurie Santos, PhD, “Savoring is the simple act of stepping out of your experience to review it and really appreciate it while it's happening.”
It can improve mood by helping us to remember the good stuff in life, it keeps us in the moment and increases gratitude.
Track your savoring experience to boost gratitude and help develop stronger healthy habits.
Here are some ways to savor a morning treat while also supporting your wellness …
- If you’re able, take a short solo walk and really savor the changing of the seasons
- Watch birds out of your window and take pleasure in their colors, songs and behavior. I put up bird feeders and installed a birdbath in my backyard, and I spend at least a half hour outdoors every morning drinking my tea and relishing my little bit of nature.
- Journaling saved my life! I committed to writing a certain number of pages longhand in a journal EVERY DAY.
- Start small—one page a day. You could write or draw or doodle, or just write an affirmation over and over again.
- DON'T PUT PRESSURE ON YOURSELF TO "PRODUCE." This is supposed to help you process your stressful life, not add to it! No one will read it other than you (and sometimes I found it useful to NOT read it after it was written). When I couldn’t think of anything to write, I would start with: “I don’t know what to write…” over and over again. Usually, about halfway down the page, something would occur to me and I’d be off to the races!
- Give it 21 days and see how you feel about it.
In fact, with ALL of the above, I would suggest committing to the practice for at least 7 days before expecting to feel any difference, and 21 days to really call it a part of your day.
I feel like a new woman—a happier, more fulfilled woman—now that I can look forward to my invigorating morning. Hope this works for you!!!
Do you have a morning practice? If so, what is your go-to routine to spring out of bed, seizing the day? Please let me know below.
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